Intro to Vaginal Health Toys & Tools

Vigina.

Vagaina.

Vegina.

Bagina.

No, our spell check isn’t broken. This is just a small snippet of the list of keywords that came up as suggestions when we started researching common questions about vaginal health for this post. We’re including it not to shame anyone for lack of spelling skills (hey, phones all come with autocorrect for a reason!) but because it struck us as the perfect metaphor for one of the most difficult aspects of sharing good vaginal health practices-- the lack of consistent, shared vocabulary for talking about vaginas and vulvas.

Today, we’ve put together an introduction to some of the toys and tools available for promoting vaginal health and wellness. But in order to show why these are so useful, first let’s talk about what a healthy vagina is, and the language we use to describe it.

Vaginal Health 101

First, let’s talk about that entire genital region so we’re on the same page about that anatomy. People often use “vagina” as a catchall phrase, but the vagina is only part of a set of genitals.

• Vagina: The internal canal, which includes the G-spot, and ends in the cervix for people who still have their uteruses.
• Vulva: The external area, which includes the mons pubis, the inner and outer labia, and the glans of the clitoris. Lots of people say “vagina” when they mean “vulva”.
• Clitoris: A partly-internal, partly-external structure rich with nerve endings. Many people think that the clitoris is just the glans, which is nestled in the labia at the top of the vulva. But the complete structure is much larger, with two branching “bulbs” and two “arms” that run internally along each side of the vulva down to the opening of the vagina.

Note that this diagram only indicates the glans of the clitoris, not the whole structure! Also pointing out that the urethra (where you pee from) is separate from both the clitoris and the vagina.

• Pelvic floor: A “hammock” of muscle that runs along the genital and anal area, supporting pelvic organs (bladder, bowel, and uterus) and helping to control urination and defecation-- and also contributing to sexual pleasure. Everyone has pelvic floor muscles (also called pubococcygeus/PC muscles or, informally, Kegel muscles), but they function slightly differently for people with penises and people with vaginas.

What constitutes a healthy vagina? Well, the pH down there is slightly acidic, which keeps “bad” bacteria at bay. That balance is maintained by estrogen, lactobacilli and corynebacterium (good bacteria), and glycogen (a storage sugar made by the vaginal lining). If that balance is disturbed, it opens the door to infections like vaginosis and yeast infections-- and can make you more vulnerable to STIs.

Discharge is a normal part of vaginal health. In a healthy vagina, discharge will be slippery, clear or slightly whitish, and mostly odorless. If your discharge is very thick, yellow, chunky, or smells bad, it’s time to get checked out and not just hope it goes away. On the flip side of that, if your vagina is very dry, you may be over-cleaning it (especially if you douche), or you may not be producing enough estrogen-- this is a common issue for women entering or past menopause.

A healthy vagina shouldn’t have burning or excessive itching sensations. Likewise, any pain or soreness in the muscles or inside the vagina is something that calls for treatment. If you find penetration difficult, painful, or impossible, you might have a condition called vaginismus, in which the PC muscles spasm and tighten up so much that it hurts even to put in a tampon, or your vagina “locks out” penetration altogether.

While we’re on the topic of tightness, let’s quickly address a common myth: having a “loose” vagina. Lots of people with vaginas worry about that, especially if they’ve had a lot of lovers, so let’s just put all our minds at ease-- you can’t “stretch out” your vagina by having “too much” sex. It’s a myth used to shame women for being sexual, and we’re done with it. First of all, your vagina naturally relaxes when you’re aroused. Second, your vagina is very elastic-- after all, it’s able to birth a baby and still go back to normal. However, having weak pelvic floor muscles (also known as Low Tone Pelvic Floor Dysfunction) can lead to a feeling like “looseness” because it’s hard to control those muscles-- but simple toning exercises like Kegels can help with that.

Some definite trouble signs include: bleeding in between periods; sores, blisters, or warts; all-around pelvic aches; or lumps. All of these should get checked out by a healthcare professional as soon as possible!

Toys and Tools for Happy Vaginas

Now that we’ve established what good vaginal health and wellness is, let’s talk about some of the toys and tools available to you to maintain that happy state.

Kegel Weights

Working out? Don’t skip vag day! You’ve probably heard of Kegel exercises, developed in the 1940’s by a gynecologist named Dr. Arnold H. Kegel as a way to help people strengthen their pelvic floor muscles against incontinence. They’re still recommended today, but it turns out that strengthening your pelvic floor has the benefit of sometimes making penetrative sex more pleasurable for people with vaginas. You may have also heard the term “pompoir” (or “kabazza” in Arabic) which refers to training the PC muscles to the point that the partner with the vagina can straddle their penis-having lover and caress or “milk” their penis with their vagina for supposedly fantastic sex and stronger orgasms. It’s a similar concept to Kegels.

Kegel weights were created to increase the effectiveness of PC muscle exercises, partly by offering more resistance than you’d have simply squeezing those muscles, and partly by giving you a tangible object to hold in there-- many people with vaginas squeeze their butts, thighs, or abdomens instead of their pelvic floor when they try to do Kegels, and this helps you focus on the right muscles.

The best weights come in a graduated set, are made of a body-safe material like silicone, and have a plastic/silicone ring or cord to make removal easy. Check out our Je Joue Ami weights or our We-Vibe vibrating weights for two of our favorites. Always use Kegel weights with plenty of lube for easy insertion and removal.

Many Ben Wa balls are sold like this-- loose, with no string or loop for removal. We don't recommend getting those because they're hard to remove.

Are they the same thing as Ben Wa balls?

Not quite, although they’re similar. Ben Wa balls have long been rumored to create unbridled sexual stimulation by putting them inside the vagina and letting them “roll around” in there. We’ve read many a bodice-ripper historical romance scene breathlessly describing the intense sensations when the pirate captain or harem master slips them into the heroine. Unfortunately, it’s...not quite like that.

While some people may indeed feel pleasure when using them, they can cause muscle strain if used for too long (same thing with Kegel weights), and they’re unlikely to feel too different than any other type of penetration.

If you’re going to use Ben Wa balls, choose them carefully. Make sure they’re steel, silicone-encased, borosilicate glass, or ABS plastic-- not stone, wood, PVC, or cheap plastic or jelly.

Avoid the ones that have nothing connecting them (like the ones pictured above)-- they may be hard to remove. But also make sure the cord is a body-safe material. Regular fiber strings cannot be thoroughly cleaned and may give you an infection.

Do I need vaginal weights?

Not necessarily. They’re just another way to work out your PC muscles, like the difference between using a treadmill with ankle weights and walking outside.

Vaginal Sensor Games

Relatively new to the market, these toys look like slender, small dildos and act similar to Kegel weights. Their goal is to encourage the user to strengthen their pelvic floor muscles by playing games on an app on their phones. You insert the sensor, which connects to the app, and use your PC muscles to operate the game.

We haven’t evaluated these ourselves, so we can’t recommend for or against them yet. However, the ones we’ve seen on the market like Elvie and Perifit were developed by or with sexual health experts, and reviews suggest that they do make those Kegels more fun to do. We’re intrigued!

Vaginal Dilators

Now we’re on the other side of the equation-- dealing with too much tightness. If you have vaginismus or High Tone Pelvic Floor Dysfunction and penetration is painful or impossible, using a set of dilators can be a valuable tool in working through it and discovering pleasure.

The vaginal dilators we carry and recommend, the Inspire Silicone Dilator Set, are body-safe silicone with a slender shape and ergonomic curve, with a loop at one end for easy removal. They start very small and slender-- about the size of a pinkie-- and gradually get larger and longer. Use them with lots of lube and lots of patience to slowly get accustomed to having something inside you.

G-Spot Toys

Sometimes, vaginal wellness isn’t about a health issue per se, but about relieving your frustration. Many people with vaginas are mystified about the G-spot-- whether it exists at all, whether it exists for them, where it is, and how to stimulate it. Many have tried to figure out how to get pleasure from their G-spot and given up when they couldn’t. (We have a whole post about the G-spot, if you want to explore more!)

Fortunately, there are plenty of toys to help with that! Toy designers have worked hard to create pieces that are curved and shaped just so-- or to create ones that are adjustable to fit your body perfectly. One of the darlings of the sex world is the Njoy Pure Wand, shaped like a smile because it’ll give you one! This medical-grade stainless steel toy has a gentle curve with one smaller knob and one larger one so you can find the size you prefer. Its weightiness satisfies your vagina’s preference for pressure-based pleasure, and its material means not just a bit of temperature play as your body heats it up, but also easy and thorough clean-up. It’s rumored that adult film star and educator Nina Hartley routinely gave Pure Wands to women she knew who were struggling to find their G-spot.

Many vibrators and insertables are also designed to hit the spot. The Svakom Amy G-Spot Vibe, for example, is shaped and curved specifically to stimulate that little area, with a slim build that makes it perfect for beginner explorers. The Fun Factory Stronic G Pulsator is likewise made for inner delight, but offers a pulsing, thrusting sensation as opposed to vibration.

Lubricant

Let’s not forget our most trustworthy friend in sex, lube! It’s not just for people experiencing vaginal dryness-- though obviously it sure helps with that-- it’s for absolutely everyone doing penetration play or for keeping friction slippery and fun instead of irritating.

The most important thing to know about your lube is its base. The three most common body-safe lubes are silicone, aloe, and water-based. Silicone, like Uberlube, is all-around wonderful and long-lasting, and tends to feel silky to the touch, but it can’t be used with silicone toys or it will damage them. Aloe, like Good Clean Love lube, is a great alternative for those toys, and it works with most bodies. It’s a little thicker, with more “cushion”, making it great for anal play but also good for vaginal sex when you want something a bit substantial. Water-based lubes like Sliquid can be used with anything, and are easy to clean up without staining sheets.

If you’re looking for flavored lube, make sure you’re buying a quality brand with no sorbitol, glycerol, or glycerin. There shouldn’t be sugars of any kind in it-- sugar contributes to yeast infections. Also, try to buy it at a store that has a sample bottle so you can get a dab on your hand to taste-test-- you don’t want to drop some bucks on a bottle of a flavor you end up hating!

Last but not least, you should know that lube does expire, eventually. If you’ve had a bottle for a while, check the date, and just toss it if it’s past that date. It might not seem that bad right now, but it’s not good for you, and eventually it’s going to get really gross.

Internal Condoms, Dental Dams, and Gloves

Protection from STIs is always part of vaginal health! Latex or non-latex alternative barriers are still one of the best ways to care for your body during sex with someone to whom you’re not fluid-bonded (meaning they’re someone with whom you've negotiated having sex without barriers, usually based on agreed-upon STI testing intervals, agreed-upon non-barrier birth control if that's necessary, and open communication about the levels of intimacy and barrier use each of you may have with other partners).

We’ve all seen disposable gloves, so that’s self-explanatory. They’re great for finger penetration, not just for the barrier, but to protect your vagina against scrapes or scratches from fingernails or rough skin. You can also buy finger cots, which are like condoms for your fingers, and are good when you don’t want to use a whole glove. (Tip for people who have long fingernails, especially acrylic or gel tips: If you don’t want to keep your first two fingernails trimmed, but you still want to finger your lover, you can pack cotton balls under your nails and put a glove over it to keep from hurting your lover. #manners)

Dental dams are small squares of latex that were originally used for-- you guessed it-- dental work, and later were adopted as a barrier to lay over a vulva for oral sex. Real talk: They’re not popular. Most people don’t use them, partly due to preference, and partly because STI transmission rates between mouths and vulvas/vaginas tend to be lower. However, it is possible to transmit STIs that way, and it’s good to know that a barrier is available. If you don’t have a dental dam, FYI, you can use a piece of plastic kitchen wrap, which is cheap and also usually close to hand.

Internal condoms are an alternative to condoms for penises. We can’t say that one is “better” than the other-- it’s really a matter of personal preference. However, penis condoms are vastly easier to get than internal condoms, which are now only available by prescription (no, it makes no sense to us either, except as a way to punish people with vaginas for having them and using them for sex). They’re tube-shaped, with a flexible ring at either end. The closed end is inserted into the vagina (it can also be used anally, with the interior ring removed) all the way up to the cervix, and the outer, open end is laid flat around the opening to the vagina. It can require a bit of holding in place to get the penis, strap-on, or insertable inside without stuffing the condom inside too, but generally they’ll stay put just fine. Remember the lube!

For any of these, remember that you need to make sure you and your partner aren’t allergic to latex before you use latex products-- and make sure you know what your barriers are made of. Also check that your lube is compatible with your barriers; the website or packaging on the barriers should tell you what you need to use.

Penetration Bumpers

It’s totally normal if you’re not a size queen. Not everyone enjoys a lot of length or girth, and for some people with vaginas, deep thrusting can be unpleasant or painful. Enter the bumper! These squishy, body-safe rings fit snugly but not tightly around an erect penis or other insertable, and can be used alone or in multiples to control how deep penetration can go without requiring anyone to thrust less enthusiastically.

We love the OhNut set, which is sold as a set of 4 linking rings that can be used alone or together depending on your needs. They come with their own travel pouch and “conversation starters”, and they’re a polymer blend with no latex that can be used with any lube.

Some Things You Definitely Don’t Need

Unfortunately, the sex product industry is very unregulated, and there are many products out there that are at best questionable and at worst actively dangerous for you. Here are a few things to steer clear of in order to keep your vagina happy and healthy:

• Rocks and gemstones. We’re not going to name names, but some celebrity gurus like to push “yoni stones” or other stone insertables that are supposed to “detox” you. That's not backed up by any evidence. Also, stones may be porous, meaning they’re difficult to keep really clean, and some stones may contain minerals that are harmful to you that can be absorbed through the lining of your vagina. They’re just not safe.
• Douches. The marketing world has done a great job of convincing people with vaginas that their genitals are dirty, stinky, and ought to smell like flowers instead. Unless you’ve got a health issue, your vagina is just fine as it is! It’s also quite self-cleaning and doesn’t need much help beyond your regular baths and showers. And if you do have a health issue, douching won’t help. They can throw off your pH balance and contribute to vaginal dryness. Hard miss!
• Vaginal steaming. This is another trendy thing we see a lot that has no basis in science and can be harmful if done wrong. The idea is that you sit on a toilet-like seat over a steaming pot of water and herbs, again to detox and cleanse your vagina. There’s no evidence that this does anything at all-- at best, it’s soothing the way a hot bath or heating pad would be. At worst, it could include herbs that are irritating to your genitals, and if the steam is too hot, you could end up with burns in the worst possible place.
• Toys made of porous or otherwise non-body-safe materials. Cheap jelly dildos, PVC, unsealed wood, glass that isn’t specifically heat-tempered for internal use-- all of these things can cause a lot of damage to your vagina. Check for anything that can’t be completely cleaned or that has any rough edges.
• Food. We totally get it-- eating dessert off of each other is hot! But in general, food doesn’t belong in your vagina, or close enough to accidentally get in it, and that goes 100x for anything with sugar. Trust us, the infections aren’t worth it.
• Toys from unreliable sources. Amazon may be a part of our everyday lives for a lot of things, but the discount you might get there from sex toys or tools may not be worth the risk. Their return policies and dealings with questionable third-party vendors mean that you could end up with (shudder) a used and returned toy, if not a knockoff or something made from harmful materials. Always buy from a trustworthy, preferably education-based sex shop.
• Anything that’s been in your butt. Your anus and rectum aren’t as dirty as you think, but still, they’ve got a lot going on back there that is not friendly to your vagina. There’s a reason you were taught to wipe from front to back! Keep your anal toys and your vaginal toys separate unless you can completely sterilize them between uses. And don’t go from anal sex with a penis to vaginal sex, unless you wear condoms for at least the first (even then, maybe wash up in between).
• Alcohol-soaked tampons. If you want a drink, have a drink. Please don’t try to get a buzz by soaking a tampon in vodka or gin and inserting it. You can damage your vaginal lining that way.

Are we good on those? Awesome! Now you’re equipped to go forth and enjoy crazy awesome sexual pleasure with a healthy, happy, and cared-for vagina. Did we miss any toys or tips? Drop it in the comments!